Reparentive Therapy

Heal the developmental trauma associated with growing up in an invalidating environment

Hi Pamela,

I am writing to express, though I imagine it may be of no surprise to you, that this group has already been profoundly impactful on my healing after just a few sessions.

Because my heart and system now know there is a place and a time each week to feel the heartbreak, be validated, and do the work of healing around this unique wound and loss, I have begun to feel lighter, more curious, more awake, and more open the rest of the week. It’s like my system has been given the spiritual permission and energy to live and love again.

Thank you for your humble and honest presence in these sessions – and also for the forethought and intention you have crafted into them. I can feel your care as the architect of this healing journey. It is an honor to be alongside you and the others in the group, who have experienced this attachment wounding from such a tender period in life.

My felt compassion for them has allowed me to give some of that to myself, which has also been invaluable in the process of letting go.

And finally, this group has also allowed me to cultivate honest empathy for (my ex partner), who has lived her life in deep pain and self-loathing. In understanding what is at the core of this wounding, I am able to release the pain that it caused me – and clinging that I have felt bound by.

I am sure there is much more feeling and growth to come, but I felt compelled to share my experience so far.

Thanks so much for leading us on this rich and beautiful path. I feel excited each week to see what comes – and most importantly, I feel well held in the experience of the group.

In gratitude,
SJ

Pamela Rosin
Pamela Rosin

Hello, I’m Pamela.

Are you…

  • An individual healing from a home with patterns of Borderline Personality Disorder? Or a similarly invalidating environment?

  • A therapist looking to help your clients overcome a legacy of Borderline Personality Disorder patterning, or

  • Like me, someone who is helping others on a professional basis while also doing the work on a personal level?

Then you’re in the right place!

What Is ReParentive™ Therapy?

The term ReParentive™ is a hybrid of two therapeutic concepts: reparative (adj) and reparent (v) and includes the concept of reparations. 

This approach has roots in therapeutic modalities that prioritize embodiment, mindfulness, liberation, and social justice; it is non-hierarchical and non-pathologizing.

ReParentive Therapy is an active process of making up for past wrongs. 

It provides the opportunity for the client to receive what they never got, without disempowering them, infantilizing, or creating problematic attachment or reenactment. 

The therapist acts as a repairing parent (thus the term), who can make reparations to the client’s child self and encourages the adult child to take in the available, safe nourishment so that they can begin to shift their internal sense of what is possible, and let the new options impact their sense of self.

Reparentive Therapy

Reparentive™ Therapy is an intergenerational trauma healing model that encompasses three main elements:

  1. An emphasis on the therapeutic relationship
  2. An emphasis on providing the group member/client with a missing experience, and
  3. The use of the therapist’s own stable, regulated nervous system as an interactive, dyadic regulator of the group member/client’s nervous system, which supports the experience of secure attachment.

Reparentive™ Therapy requires the therapist to embody the characteristics and qualities that provide the adult child of a parent with Borderline Personality Disorder or with longstanding attachment issues, (emotional dysregulation, distress tolerance)--with a missing, reparative, relational experience.

In this model the therapist learns how to be a predictable and reliable source of support and to effectively, consistently, and non-defensively show up for relational interactions and provide repair.

The qualities that are cultivated in the therapist / group leader include transparency, humility, and authenticity. 

The therapist needs to provide both empathic relational connection and clear, consistent boundaries, while simultaneously supporting the clients’ experience of autonomy and choice. 

The therapist, unlike the parent with BPD, celebrates the clients’ success and reinforces their sense of agency and individuation. 

An emphasis is placed on accepting imperfection with grace and compassion and highlighting the reality that human beings are messy and mistakes are a natural part of being human, especially in relationship!

Reparentive Therapy

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